


i've been waiting my whole life (when i've only been dreaming)

by SheBeanSheep



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BAMF Haruno Sakura, Character Development, Gen, Kinda, Mito Uzumaki as Inner Sakura, Reincarnation, Sakura beats the revenge out of Sasuke, Strong Haruno Sakura, Tags Will Update as Story Does, Team as Family, because sakura 'accidentally' finds it in a book, but she doesn't start off bamf, eventually, i can't stop thinking about this, naruto learns about the uzumaki, no planned relationships right now, redeemed characters, unplanned updates, wont be abandoned until i say so
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-19
Updated: 2018-07-21
Packaged: 2019-06-12 19:08:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15346590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SheBeanSheep/pseuds/SheBeanSheep
Summary: Before she was a boy-crazy fangirl, Sakura wanted nothing more than to be a good shinobi. Afterall, that's what the voice, Inner Sakura, wanted. But Sakura just wanted to be Ino's friend. So all of her energy went into making sure Ino would still like her, would still consider her a friend and a rival. So, Sakura bypassed the training scrolls of her childhood and picked up a hairbrush, shutting Inner Sakura away.Then, Team 7 got the Wave Mission.Then, Inner Sakura got a name.Then, everything changed.





	1. living in between all the black and white

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Gathering Threads](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14706426) by [orphan_account](https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account). 



> So, I have no clue where this is going. It's just a plot bunny I got and couldn't shake. Honestly, all of my knowledge of Naruto Shippuden comes from fanfictions, so we'll see how this goes. This chapter is really, really short, but it just seemed like the right place to stop (plus it's just the prologue). Other chapters will probably be longer, though. 
> 
>  
> 
> Title is from The Score's song Revolution.  
> Chapter title is from The Score's song Strange.

Sakura was an anomaly to her parents. Why would a child from a sheltered, quaint, but most importantly, civilian, family want to become a shinobi? Only a fleeting amount of attention was spent on what most civilian girls normally did, such as dress up and dolls. No, Sakura was more interested in watching the shinobi of the village with such an intensity that had no right to be there. Sakura could care less about the bullies at the playground that taunted her with cruel names. All the six year old wanted to do was study her scrolls until she could _finally_ enter the Academy.

The rose haired child would’ve asked to enter the Academy sooner, but her parents had begged her to wait until she was seven, which was the normal acceptance age for the Shinobi Academy. They had hoped that their little girl would change her mind about becoming a kunoichi, wished that their precious daughter would choose a safer profession. However, nothing could deter Sakura Haruno from her decision. Whenever Sakura thought about not being a shinobi, she was overwhelmed with such intense feelings of _wrong, bad, STOP!_

So, Sakura would become a student at the Academy. Sakura was going to listen to the voice, recently dubbed as ‘Inner Sakura’. Sakura would become a protector of the village, one of its strongest pillars. Sakura would be able to look at herself in the mirror and be strong and proud. Sakura was going to be a shinobi. One day, Sakura would be able to make Inner Sakura proud.

No matter how much Sakura desired to be a shinobi, she was, however, still a child. And so when the bully’s cries of “Weirdo!” and “Forehead chick!” and “Loner!” got to be too much, Sakura was at a loss. That’s when Ino Yamanaka swooped into Sakura’s life. Like a ray of sunshine, Ino was Sakura’s safe haven, almost as much as her scrolls. Ino was like a whirlwind, dragging Sakura out of her shell and becoming her _friend._  As much as Sakura wanted to be a good kunoichi, a good _shinobi,_ she didn’t want to lose the friend she had in Ino.

So Sakura shut that part of her away. Sakura ignored the part of her during lectures that screamed _that’s not right stop you utter fool!_ Sakura followed along with Ino to fawn over the broody Last Uchiha, ignoring the tiny whispers of _train, you’ll die if you’re this unprepared_. Sakura joined with the rest of the village in shunning the whisker haired boy, ignoring the wailing part of her that uttered one, desperate word: _Kushina._

Sakura continued this way past graduation. Once she was on a genin team, Sakura was too ingrained in her habits of ignoring the voice. She didn’t train, the part of her that just wanted to be Ino’s friend and would do _anything_ to stay that way still ruled over Sakura. So Sakura still fawned over the Uchiha. She still hit and yelled at the Uzumaki. She still did the bare minimum of physical training, as it wouldn’t be what _Ino_ would do. She still ignored the cage in which she had shut Inner Sakura into all those years ago. 

Until Wave.

Until thinking that Sasuke was dead.

Until seeing that malicious chakra rolling off Naruto in waves, the chakra which the voice _recognized._

The voice burst through the walls that Sakura had built up, roaring and demanding to be heard.

The voice that screamed at Sakura for being such an _idiot,_ ranted at her for shutting her away proved to be too much. 

Sakura Haruno passed out, still clutching the kunai she used to shakily, pitifully protect the bridge builder. 

Sakura Haruno would wake up to a concerned sensei and a warm bed, with an inner voice which now had a name.

_Mito Uzumaki_


	2. all those nights alone (they were the start of something great now)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sakura tries to understand what's happening in her mind.  
> Mito just wants Sakura to stop calling her Inner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woah. I wasn't expecting this to be so popular (my friend is getting rather sick of me texting her freaking out)   
> Thank you all so much for the comments in the last chapter! This one is a little bit longer, so I hope you enjoy!  
> (I've also fixed the formatting, I didn't realize how iffy it looked with how I had it last chapter.)  
> Also, I was stumped on how to distinguish Sakura's thoughts from Mito, but I've come up with something. 
> 
> Chapter is from The Score's song Shakedown

' _The italics with single quotes are Sakura's thoughts.'_

_The plain italics are Mito talking to Sakura._

When there's a sentence with just  _one_ word italicized, then it's simply just an emphasis.

All other text is formatted as you would expect.

 

Once Sakura’s vision cleared from its post sleep blurriness, she was greeted by the sight of her sensei reading Icha Icha in the chair next to the bed. “Maa, Sakura-chan, you shouldn’t worry your dear old sensei like that,” Kakashi drawled, giving his infamous eye smile. “You weren’t hurt at all in the battle, were you?”

Sakura clutched her head, feeling like it had just been smashed with a doton jutsu. “No, sensei. I wasn’t hurt. I just have a headache right now, that’s all.” Sakura took a shuddery breath and sat up, trying to ignore the pain. She was in the middle of clearing the fog surrounding her memories when she gasped and looked at Kakashi. “Sasuke-kun! And Naruto! Are they okay?”

Patting her leg, Kakashi reassured, “Sasuke and Naruto are both okay. They’re just a little scratched up from the battle and are sleeping it off. You, on the other hand, passed out.”

Sakura gave a faint smile at hearing her teammates were okay; the pain slowly receding from her body. “I’m sorry about passing out, sensei. It’s never happened before.” Biting her lip in thought, Sakura glanced down to her hands, which were gripping the blanket.

 ‘ _If there had been another enemy after Tazuna-san while I was passed out, then he would’ve been dead. We could’ve failed the mission because of me. I was useless in that battle, weak. That was the one thing I never wanted to be when I was younger.’_ Sakura’s eyes scrunched up as she pushed those thoughts out of her mind.

Kakashi studied his female student for a minute, then stated calmly. “If it happens again then we’ll go to a medic, alright?” He got a nod in response. “Great! Now then, I think we should wake up the boys so we can have breakfast and leave, wouldn’t you say?” Sakura glanced up at her sensei and gave him a small smile, humming an affirmative.

 _Well, I thought the Hatake brat would never leave._ Sakura startled and made a shaky grab for her pack on the nightstand next to her, pulling out a kunai. A tinkling laugh rang throughout the room. _Glad to see you’re at least slightly competent. I refuse to be stuck in the subconscious of a weak kunoichi. Although, your mental abilities have to be at least above average, considering you’ve mostly managed to block me out all these years._

Sakura blinked, then hesitantly called out, “Inner? Is that you?” A snort was her only answer before Naruto burst into the room.

“Sakura-chan! You’re alright! I was so worried because you passed out and Sasuke was worried too but he’s too much of a bastard to show it hey Sakura-chan did you see me totally kick ass in that fight?” Naruto shouted all in one breath. Sakura blinked slowly, trying to understand the word vomit that the blond boy just spewed. Inner was suspiciously quiet. Naruto opened his mouth, presumably to shout more, but he was cut off by Kakashi coming to get them for breakfast.            

* * *

 

The meal was filled with Naruto and Inari chattering away, Tsunami and Tazuna smiling at the boy’s antics, Kakashi had already finished eating, while Sasuke and Sakura simply ate quietly. _That boy is pure Uzumaki, loud and rambunctious. Though, the blond coloring is unusual._

Sakura, who had been taking a sip of her water at the time, began to sputter and cough. The conversation died down and everyone looked at Sakura. “I’m fine,” the girl croaked once she recovered. “Just swallowed wrong, that’s all,” a shaky laugh followed her explanation.

The conversation started back up between Naruto and Inari, which seemed to spur everyone back to what they were doing before Sakura’s choking incident. Kakashi eyed the girl for a few more seconds before getting up to clean his dish.

* * *

 

The trip back to Konoha was quiet, excluding Naruto’s usual brand of loudness. Without a civilian, Team 7 was able to cut down on the travel time a bit. On what was supposed to be the day they got back to Konoha, Sakura was still trying to understand what was going on inside her mind. ‘ _What did Inner mean about an Uzumaki Clan? And that… feeling… on the bridge… was it really Naruto?’_ Sakura’s eyes drifted to where the Uzumaki was trying to pick a fight with the black haired Uchiha.

Sakura very carefully didn’t stiffen when Inner huffed. _How can you be a Konoha shinobi, even a genin, and not know about your sister village? Saru ought to be ashamed of the quality of his upcoming shinobi._

Eyes widening, Sakura reevaluated all she knew about the voice called Inner Sakura. _I can’t be going crazy or making this up since I don’t know anything about what the voice is talking about. And sister village? Saru? As in Hokage-sama?_

The voice broke her out of the thoughts running through Sakura’s mind. ’ _Uzushio. Konoha and Uzushio are longtime allies. The Uzumaki clan is from Uzushio. I have an actual name, too. It’s rather rude of you to not ask for it. Getting called Inner Sakura is rather rude when you think about it_

“-kura-chan! Sakura-channnnnnnn!” A voice, which she dimly recognized to be Naruto, caused Sakura to register what she was seeing. The Hokage's office. She must’ve been really distracted for her not to realize they were already back in Konoha. The Hokage gave Kakashi a strong look before turning to the genin.

“Well, it seems you’ve had quite the mission. Why don’t you all take a few days off to recover? I need to speak with your sensei at the moment,” the gravelly voice of Sarutobi stated.

As the man took a breath of his pipe, Kakashi turned to the three genin. “Hokage-sama has a good idea. We’ll meet again in three days, the usual place and time,” Kakashi said with a smile. The three genin took that as their cue to leave, although Naruto wouldn’t leave until he got a promise of ramen from the Hokage. 

* * *

 

Back at her house, after being sufficiently fussed over by her parents, Sakura collapsed onto her bed with a groan. The groan simply intensified after hearing the voice call out to her. _Well, aren’t you going to ask me my name? Or how I got to be in your mind? Granted, I don’t really have an answer for that. I’m supposed to be dead, after all._

That got Sakura to jump up and nearly scream, which she thankfully suppressed. Still, Sakura stuttered out, “D-dead? What do you mean dead?! Who _are_ you? _What_ are you?” Sakura somehow got the impression that the… thing… in her subconscious was leveling a rather unimpressed stare at her.

 The voice seemed to let out a long sigh. _I died… oh probably a while ago. Considering Sarutobi’s age. I’m pretty sure I’m just a spiritual manifestation, although I’m not sure. I’ll think about it more la-_

“You didn’t answer my question. Who. Are. You?” Sakura cut off with a snarl, losing any remaining patience.

_Mito Uzumaki. The princess, well, the former princess, of the Uzumaki Clan, wife of the Shodai Hokage, first jinchuriki in general and of the Kyuubi specifically. Also, I’m a fuinjutsu expert and a rather strong kunoichi, if I do say so myself. Pleased to… officially… meet you, Sakura Haruno._

Sakura blinked. Slowly. She took a deep breath before mumbling to herself, “I’m just going to go to sleep now. By tomorrow, everything will be normal again. I won’t have a crazy voice in my head claiming to be the wife of Konoha’s first leader.” With that, Sakura dozed off into a rather restless sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you enjoyed then be sure to leave a comment! Or if you have anything you want to say.   
> Next chapter should be out by Saturday at the latest, seeing as I already have an idea and just need to write it.  
> (I still can't believe how much people are enjoying this, I'm in a permanent state of shock at this point)


	3. don't cry (hold your head up high)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Library escapades, breakdowns, and talks.
> 
> also known as: a lot of shit happens

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A longer chapter for you guys today! Sorry, I meant to have this posted yesterday, but before I knew it it was one AM!  
> Thank you all for the comments! I'll be sure to answer them, just give me some time. 
> 
> Note: In no way shape or form am I an expert on Japanese, so I will probably mess up the honorifics at some point. I'm trying to keep the use to a minimum, but I apologize in advance for any mistakes I make.
> 
> Chapter title is from Above the Cloud's of Pompeii by Bear's Den (which is such a beautiful song I highly recommend it!)

Sakura awoke slowly and peacefully. She rose a hand to rub her eyes, the other going to her mouth to cover the yawn that escaped. “Man, that sure was a crazy dream,” Sakura muttered.

 _You slept late. Rise and shine, Sakura-chan! You should go to the library today, I would like to see what’s happened in the years following my death._ With a curse that would make her mother faint, Sakura put the kunai she had hastily grabbed back.

“Oh right, I had forgotten. I really _am_ going certified crazy. I didn’t think it would happen this early in my career,” Sakura groaned with a rather dry undertone, then got off of her bed, albeit reluctantly. Walking over to her closet, Sakura contemplated what to do. “Even if I am just crazy,” the genin began, pulling out her usual outfit, “my subconscious came up with some interesting things. At the very least, I should check and see if anything’s actually true.” Ignoring the sigh from the voice, and the sense of irritation, Sakura bounded downstairs, grabbed an apple while also ignoring her parent’s requests to eat a proper breakfast, then made her way to the library.

Safely tucked away in between the shelves of nonfiction books, Sakura bit her lip in thought. _‘What should I start with?’_ A snort escaped the girl against her will. _‘I wonder if researching what the voice in your head tells you is the first sign of insanity. Though, where would leave Sasuke-kun? I think he’s a little past that point.’_ Giving a low chuckle at that, Sakura made her way to the “U” section. “A lot of what I heard was Uzumaki and Uzushio, so may as well start there...”

 _Don’t forget a Konoha history scroll, kid. Specifically one about Hashirama, Tobirama, and… Madara. Since you seem oh so eager to doubt my statements, I’ll probably be included in one of those scrolls to prove my claims._ Sakura, who had grown used the woman’s voice popping in, simply nodded in acknowledgment and went to go pick up some history scrolls.

* * *

 With wide eyes and a trembling body, Sakura looked at the scrolls she uncovered and spread out across the table she had claimed. Everything was in there. Mito Uzumaki, of the Uzumaki clan, was the wife of the Shodai Hokage. The Uzumaki Clan were the most prominent family in Uzushio, specializing in fuinjutsu. None of the scrolls said anything about whatever a jinchuriki was, but everything else was true. Uzushiogakure and Konohagakure were longtime allies, but Uzushio and all her people were destroyed in the Second Shinobi War. Any survivors scattered and hid, due to the fear of being hunted by Kiri and Iwa nin.

A faint, hitched breath tore Sakura’s eyes away from the scrolls. “You… you were telling the truth?” Sakura whispered, wetting her lips. “You’re really Mito Uzumaki? Or, the spirit of her? And the Uzumaki are a clan? Practically a royal one?”

Another shaky breath. _Were, Sakura-chan. According to the scrolls, nearly all of the Uzumaki died._ The voice- Mito- sounded dead at that moment. A minute passed, and then Mito continued to speak. _I’m still not sure why my spiritual being manifested in your mind, but I think we’re stuck together._

Not sure of how to comfort the newly found companion, Sakura began to gather up the scrolls. “For what it’s worth, Mito-san, I am sorry.” Silence was her only answer. 

* * *

Sakura stayed in the library for the rest of the day, researching spirits, the mind, _anything_ that could possibly shed some light on the situation she found herself in. Not that any of the scrolls were any help. There was no previously recorded incident of something similar happening before. Nobody seemed to think that such a thing was even _possible._ In fact, there was a research paper by a Yamanaka who used _pages_ of words to describe how simply _preposterous_ the very idea was.

Sakura let out a sardonic snort. _‘Guess what, buddy, it seems like it’s pretty fucking possible to me.’_ With that thought, it was like all of the barriers she’d put up during the day collapsed. _‘This is permanent, isn’t it? Oh, Kami, I have another person, the wife of the founder of my very village, stuck in my head. Me! The weak, civilian born wanna-be kunoichi on a team full of future powerhouses. I don’t understand why this is happening! Will I have to live with somebody else witnessing my entire life? I don’t want that!’_

As Sakura rapidly stacked the scrolls she had out, tears began to blur her vision. Sakura let her hair hang down in front of her face while walking at a barely polite speed out of the library. Once outside, however, Sakura _ran,_ tears flowing down her face.

* * *

When Sakura finally stopped, she had uneven red splotches all over her face and was panting heavily. Wiping off the alarmingly large amount of sweat on her forehead, Sakura looked around. She had made it to the Hokage Monument, the Shodai’s head specifically. Another snort escaped Sakura, and then another one immediately followed due to the sheer _irony_ of where she had run to.

_That’s starting to become a habit, I’ve noticed. The snorting at all the wrong moments._

Sakura let out a shaky giggle. “So it seems, Mito-san. I could’ve made worse habits, I suppose,” Sakura sniffed. “Kami, look at me. Look at _us._ How are we going to deal with this? It’s not exactly like I can expect you to just sit there and be quiet for the rest of my life, right?”

_That’s a correct assumption. Although, I believe that this may actually help you in the long run, Sakura-chan._

As if sensing her disbelief at that statement, Mito continued. _While you were researching, I took that time to regain my bearings, so to speak. And I think I have a slight, basic idea of what we can base this off of. Tell me Sakura-chan, are you familiar with jinchuriki? Or the bijuu?_

Sakura’s green eyes narrowed in thought, “Well, about twelve years ago, the Yondaime Hokage defeated the kyuubi after it attacked the village. He gave his life to kill the kyuubi.” Whatever the girl was expecting, it wasn’t for Mito to snort like she had been doing all day.

_A bijuu is a chakra construct. They can’t be killed, only sealed. I was the first person to seal a bijuu, in my case the kyuubi, into a person. I was the first jinchuriki, or human sacrifice if you want to get technical._

Mito went on to explain about the jinchuriki and what exactly that entails. Furrowing her brow, Sakura ventured, “So, you’re saying that in our scenario, you’re the bijuu and I’m the jinchuriki? Just without an actual seal?”

_It’s probably more complicated than that, but yes. By the way, you could always think what you want to say; I’m in your mind, after all. It’ll probably help you to not get looked at like you’re insane for talking to yourself. Plus, it’ll be less conspicuous._

“Now that you mentioned it, what exactly do you experience?” Sakura asked, a frown tilting at her mouth.

Mito hummed in thought. _Well, I experience every sensation you do, except for taste and touch. Imagine a movie playing with smells along with sight and sound. I feel your emotions to an extent, although that may just be leftover from my lifetime. I’m assuming that the only reason I’m hearing your thoughts the way I am is because it’s consensual. If either one of us didn’t want to hear the other, then I’m sure we could put up a barrier. Your childhood is proof of that._

Sakura’s mouth quirked up as she stood and stretched. “It’s almost time for dinner, so we should head back. In the meantime, I want to know if you’re opposed to watching over my training.” Mito startled, but a grin that wouldn’t be out of place on a certain blond boy soon spread across her face.

_You’re going to be in for the training of a lifetime, so be prepared._

Despite feeling in over her head and a sense of impending doom, Sakura couldn’t help smiling as well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't expecting this chapter to be so plot-oriented, so that was a rather pleasant surprise.
> 
> As always, comment what you thought!

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed! Updates will be sporadic, but that's life for you. I should be able to write quite often though, so there's that at least! Sorry if there are any grammar issues. Feel free to comment what you thought!


End file.
